I HAVE A BIG RED BRUISE ON MY THIGH!!!!!

It wasn't really red at first then dear insisted that it would be best to rub it hard so that the blood flows. So now I am left with a red bruise that isn't so painful anymore.

Someone ever told me, 'There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroad, afraid, confused and without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course, when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back.'

When you are at crossroads, there are choices we have to make.

I was supposed to visit my grandma a few days ago but when I was on the phone with her she brought up the topic about boyfriends after hearing from my aunt that I was going out with a 'wrong' guy. So, she kept telling me to focus on my studies and to be with someone that will not hinder my dreams and aspirations.

First Choice: To lie or not to lie

I lied.
I lied that this guy was just a very good friend of mine who was still studying.
I lied so that she wouldn't worry.
I lied knowing that one day she will find out the truth and be so disappointed in me.
I lied with tears trickling down my face.

一个谎言不管编制得多完美， 始终还是会被揭穿的。而当谎言被揭穿时， 对方的痛是你无法想像的。

Honestly speaking, I have told a whole pack of lies to my parents just so that I can have the best of both worlds. I used to feel so guilty for telling these lies but as time goes by I have gotten used to it.

Ironically, telling these lies seem so new and unnatural to me all of a sudden. Maybe because this time I am lying to a person so dear to me that lying to her has never crossed my mind.

I always how they will feel if they were to realise that their daughter/granddaughter had been lying to them all these while. I bet they will be so disappointed and I will be too embarrassed to face them.

That is why I chose to spend less time at home cos I figured out that this will minimise the number of lies I have to tell adn maybe this will help lighten their disappointment.

In the end, I chose not to visit my grandma cos I have no idea how to face her after all the lies that I have told her and I really really don't want to tell her more lies.

Avoidance, in this case, might be the best cure.

Second Choice: To choose to have a guilty-conscience or to be guilt-free

For now, my choice will be to have a guilty-conscience.

I beg to differ on the part of turning around when faced with the unknown.
In fact, I believe that every song has an ending, whether good or bad, but is that any reason not to enjoy the music?
Nobody can predict the future. Will we get married, have kids and live happily after? I don't know. But for now, I know I love him and I am happy with him. All I want is to be happy.
Some think that I am very selfish to build my happiness at the expense of others but I choose to believe that that will not be the case. That's why I don't see the reason why I should just turn around and back out just because I am uncertain of what lies ahead of us.